Mr. Right vs. Mr. Right Now
We’ve all been through that dating experience… you meet Mr. Right, everything is going perfectly and then bam! All of sudden you or he is not interested any more… and you’re not quite sure what went wrong.
It’s great if the party that loses interest is you, because well, it doesn’t matter anymore does it? However if you’re the party that’s left behind wondering and struggling, well it just plain sucks doesn’t it?
The Mirrors of Relationship
So first off, you’re not going insane, this really did happen. It’s quite common in relationships actually, and it’s called the mirrors of relationship.
Basically, up until a certain point in your evolutionary development, many of the relationships that come into your life do so in order to show you something about yourself. The same holds true for the other party.
The moment you or the other party gains conscious awareness of what it is you came together to learn, the energetic pull that pulls you into the relationship will fall away, causing you to lose interest.
So how do you recognise Mirrors?
The Mirrors of Relationship are pretty easy to identify actually, and are most easily spotted by looking at any characteristic in your partner that bugs you or that you hold in awe.
Once you have the characteristic, e.g., I love how possessive John is, then you would compare it against a list of questions:
- Where am I like this?
- Where do I judge this in others or myself?
- Where do I resist or fear this in my life?
- Where do I look up to others for having this characteristic?
- Where do I fear this not materializing in my life?
- Where have I lost or compromised parts of myself to have this in my life?
- Where have I lost or compromised this characteristic in myself?
- Where have I given this up in someone else that I’ve lost?
- Am I meeting my own expectations of who I thought I’d be?
- Am I meeting my parents/my family/society/God’s expectations of myself?
- Do I feel like my parents/my family/society/God are living up to my expectations of them?
Not every single question will apply when you go through the process, but just ignore those that don’t. The trick however, is to answer honestly, as honestly as possible, and maybe bring in a friend who will help you with an objective view.
Once you’ve taken a few characteristics and answered the questions honestly on all of them, you’ll start seeing patterns and similarities across the statements.
Those statements are the core beliefs at play in your situation at present, and usually awareness alone can be enough to release them. If you are battling to release the awareness, you could try one of the mental processes on Life Coaches Toolbox.
Making it work for you
If you start working with mirrors and using them, you’ll be addicted pretty quickly; they’re a powerful tool for blasting through the energy blocks that keep drawing you back into the same bad relationship patterns.
So when you’re dating, you make this work for you by applying healing principles backwards.
In this case, the philosophy says that the next person you attract will pick up energetically exactly where the last person left off – so ask the new person the burning questions you have from your last relationship, eg. What do you think commitment means?
I hope it goes without saying that you should make this conversational and part of a natural flow of conversation, and it shouldn’t be anything like an interview or twenty questions.
When you have statements from your new potential beau, you cycle those statements through the mirrors questions and look for patterns and repeats.
If you have an awareness and shift the belief system, and it was only the mirror holding you to the person, then you or they will lose interest with almost immediate effect.
This process means that you will be able to change the energy of the guys you are attracting and remove the blocks that have held you back from happiness in the past, welcoming a whole new level of love and commitment into your life.
It’s also a powerful technique to use to help you clear away the hurt after a relationship, especially when you still feel strongly drawn towards the person but don’t know why.
For more information visit Life Coaches Toolbox.